Grant Throttle
How to Help my Heartbroken Daughter - Opinions wanted from guys too.?
She is 17 and he was her first "love". She thought he loved her, and they did hug, kiss, cuddle and hold hands a lot. Granted, they rarely saw each other out of school and they text-ed a lot. Then out of the blue he tells her he's going back to his ex, that it was always the ex, that he only wanted someone to kiss/hug, hold hands with while missing the ex and insinuated she was shallow for not having a more "meaningful" relationship with him. Keep in mind that in the whole on again off again year they were together? He only took her on two dates. Now he is treating her horribly at school, being really snobbish. Any suggestions, comments, etc.? I hurt so bad for her and want to throttle him as do her father and brothers...not that they will, but you know what I mean.
when you are young, it is easy to get caught up in the puppy love and the feelings and emotions of love. Unfortunately, you don't know what true love is when you are so young. The feelings of having a BF or GF is terrific and sometimes makes you do stupid things or clown around like you are on top of the world.
If you do not exercise control, you will sink very deep into the emotions of love and perhaps the physical intimacy of love and it becomes very hard to back out or end this relationship. You become so intertwined in this infatuation that it tears you up if you do not have the physical intimacy. This becomes dangerous because you are nolonger satisfied with just holding hands or hugging. This is a danger sign of selfish love or eros where you are in the relationship only for yourself and satisfying your own needs.
This kind of describes your rocky relationship with your BF. He only wants the physical intimacy for himself and he found you as a replacement for his X-GF. The more he thinks about it, you are just another warm body but in his mind he cannot distinguish the difference between the X and U.
Unless they mature in their understanding of Love, they will still remain infantile in their attempts to fill that void but finding people to crave. In their wake they leave a lot of people broken-hearted and hurting.
Unfortunately, you have been one of the casualties of love. It hurts and it is difficult to get out of it. But it is important to heal from these wounds and the scars will remain but it won't hurt so much with time. But don't lash out or plot revenge. Learn about true love and what it is all about.
True love is as defined in the Bible in I Cor 13 where it describes love as a patience, kindness, gentleness, respect, not irritable, long suffering, not selfish ... please read it.
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